One day last December I was out listening to music and a favourite track by British progressive house band Underworld began its Asian inspired beat. Immediately I was inspired to unleash the beast as they say whilst sat having yet another coffee. The title and ending line are said in the same nonsensical style of the song (below in YouTube link).
Life. Is it a test of something greater to come or are we just dropped between aching legs and once of age, well, work it all out. I think it’s something hovering in the middle like a frustrated clitoris struggling to frenzy. This isn’t all there is and we don’t scientifically know what’s to come once our pupils fix and dilate. Spiritually there are many theories and those of faith will cling on to hope.
Being born can be a curse upon both society and yourself. If you’re psychologically afflicted you’ll know what I mean. We feel life’s burdens more than anyone else. Or so we think. Many disguise innermost dilemmas with those Jack-the-lad, life-and-soul, “fuck you, I’m the bollocks” facades. But us, for want of a better word, psychos battle through life bearing our innermost soul with hearts held beating within palm of hand. Feeling, hurting, and often losing control. Then being judged. Judged.
Life can make us quite literally suffer the passion of the Christ. Intense pain that’s as constant as our misunderstood childlike personalities. We become mute trying to explain our current mood. Acting out, bingeing, clutching scissor blades or hiding away in our burrows. Avoidance and ruminating chaos as eyes well up with Wonderland tears. Whatever your brain is exasperating your soul with, it isn’t who you are and you’re not going snorting bull crazy. There’s no chilli powder up your nose, you’re just differently wired. If all you want to do is seek solitude to calm down, reflect deep breathe relax, just say so and scamper to your burrow.
Grunt and go so people will know. A new life quite perhaps?
Life sucks yet life is great! Love is tarnished with confused hate and that’s okay. Remember the stay\go contradictory headfuck. Existence is a dizzying mix of journeys, experiences and curious moments. Of fleeting dreams and pesky setbacks. Some people have their noses in literature whilst others dress up kittens. On good days we can leap frog over gravestones and on bad days behead show-off daffodils. There’s nothing wrong with that.
Bullet at the wrong head… Life’s good, your thoughts misled.
© Copyright: Sharon Lawson™