‘Sometimes’ Sums Up BPD

Suggested audio: Sometimes by Les Rhythmes Digitales

Ask a silly question but do any songs remind you of yourself? Of course the answer is yes. Highly likely there’s scores of the weird and wonderful hint at different aspects of your personality. I imagine you’ve got that playlist on your phone personal to you that you lie listening to in times of woe. But you soon flip it and play your upbeat classics. Even Paul McCartney’s Frog Chorus as used in the Rupert the Bear animation? Me too!

The following track from 1999 just clipped me around the ears and it strongly reminds me of my awkwardness. Or so I’m told by those who deem it fit to criticise you. Fucking take that plank out of your own eye before attempting to remove the splinter in mine. I’m not even apologising for adding a forbidden word to Matthew 7:5. That’s how annoyed I suddenly became just then.

You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eyeMatthew 7:5

On with the show. So the song Sometimes by Les Rhythmes Digitales has now repeated itself in my beloved Sony headphones and the lyrics make me think.

  • Sometimes when I wake at night I feel that nothing on earth could ever hurt me – then I realise dammit, I’m still physically and mentally afflicted.
  • Nothing I say could ever deserve me – my lack of self belief which still haunts me and contributes to destructive thinking.
  • The next larger verse actually amuses me and reminds me of my tendency to almost always speak before I think. Case in hand today, we were discussing the economy of Brazil. The biggest export being coffee and I blarted out “cocaine”. Cue short awkward silence before being met with the answer “yes, very big”. Made me laugh anyway!

Sometimes
When I wake at night
I feel that nothing on earth
Could ever hurt me

Sometimes
When I know my mind
I feel like nothing I say
Could ever deserve me

I’m stood on the tip of my own tongue
I’m caught in the space between the concept and the execution
I’m stuck in the back of my own throat
I’m lost in the void between the instinct and the institution

It’s more than vocabulary
Takes more that a dictionary

Sometimes
When I wake at night
I feel that nothing on earth
Could ever hurt me

© Copyright: Sharon Lawson™

5 thoughts on “‘Sometimes’ Sums Up BPD

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